2003-??-?? - Dunno
If you've ever/will ever see me cry, it's not because of what the rest of you think, that I really do care about things deep down inside of me. I cry because I. FUCKING. HATE. LIFE., and nobody ever believes me! Some call me a pessimist, and counter, saying "Oh, one of these days you'll meet the right girl and you'll find the right job and blah blah blah.." Well guess what? I FOUND three lovely girls, they STILL didn't work out, I think most jobs are useless, and I'm not going to wait around year after year for something that may never happen. That's fucking right.. there's just as much chance that I'm not going to find all that lovey-dovey bullshit as there is that I am. So being an optimist is just as retarded as being a pessimist, and if you take the middle, purely objective route – which I did for the first 15 years of my life – you'll find out the truth.. that LIFE IS SHIT. Sure, life's got a couple perks, but in the whole scheme of things those perks are about as appetizing as the clean spots on a butcher's knife after 15 people have been stabbed by it. People don't look at the knife, see the clean spots, and admire how pretty they are. What they do is look at the knife, see all the blood, say "ewww… that's nasty", and then look away. LIFE IS FUCKING NASTY. Please, feel free to stop me if I'm wrong here..
U don't know. U don't have a fucking clue. Yeh, I have pain that I need to learn to let go of. FUCK. YOU! I have pain that doesn't go away becuz the sources of my pain do not go away. U think it's just a little problem and I'm being selfish, ignorant, and ungrateful to what life has given me. You have no fucking idea how deep my pain runs. U don't know how many lifetimes of blood have run freely from my arms. U've never seen me cry, u've never seen me go apeshit on anything in reach becuz I have just lost my very very very large amount of patience. Call me pessimistic. Ur optimism is BS. Life isn't great at all. Yeh, I have the perfect life: family that cares for me, perfect GPA, deep friends, a nice job.. what more could I want, right? U ever think of all the people that r freezing their asses off rite now cuz they have nowhere to go? O wait, maybe it did cross ur mind, but ur ignorance and radical optimistic view forced it out becuz.. that's not a "happy" thought. U can focus on everything this life "gave" you (fucking bullshit). If it ain't broke, don't fix it. Well what if it is broke? Then pretend it's not there?? FUCK YOU people and ur condescending talk to me about how I choose to suffer. I'm gonna fucking make changes. It'd b a lot easier if rational people, not so self-absorbed with their new cars and fancy fucking gadgets would stand by me. But no.. u materialistic fucks r what taints this Godforsaken planet. I will never b like u, and if u keep talking your bullshit to me, which u have no fucking right to.. ur gone. FUCK YOU!
